When we moved to rural Indiana, I knew we were finally home. Jon had completed his education. We bought an amazing house that we could see our children as teenagers in. I adored the community and knew Jon had important work there. We had amazing friends who supported what we did. I was working in the church and excited about the ministry. There was a fantastic group of boys Xander’s age that I could see greatly impacting his Christian identity before graduation. The school community would rally around Titus and help him be successful as he grew and developed.
Then God said, This way now.
When we moved to Silver City, New Mexico, I knew we were finally home. Jon was getting an additional degree, and here he would be able to practice with it. We had an amazing home that would be fantastic for our kids as they got bigger. Our church was invested in children and excited about ours. I had a great group of friends, an amazing BFF, and a great vision of ministry and career. The Arts community would help my kids develop their creativity. There were services available to Titus that would help him be successful.
Then God said, This way now.
I am so thankful to be here in Fort Defiance. The kids’ school is fantastic. I know that graduating from Rehoboth will prepare them for great success. I know the music and art program will give them confidence to use their creativity to glorify our Creator. The neighborhood we live in is unique and fun. I greatly enjoy our Navajo church and getting to know amazing people in this culture.
And I will keep listening to God.
As you may have noticed, I crave security. I desire to put roots down firmly somewhere. Considering life in 10, 15, 20 years makes me feel good. Which makes it quite a temptation as a false god.
Our pastor recently preached on the cost of following Jesus, the story in Luke 9:57-62 about reason to not follow Jesus. I was struck by the man who came up to Jesus on the road and said, I will follow you wherever you go. And Jesus’ response was
Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head. (Luke 9:58)
Was this man also tempted toward chasing security? Did he think that once he said he’d follow Jesus, he could rest in the assurance that he was where he was supposed to be? Was Jesus cautioning him that following Him was a sacrifice of being able to envision what life would look like in 10, 15, 20 years?
This has been present in my mind since my mentor heard God asking her to resign from her long-time leadership in a beautiful, life-altering ministry. He hasn’t told her what her next steps are, just that it was time for her to change path. How inspiring to me to see her obedience!
A couple summers ago, our VBS theme was Journey Off the Map. (I’m totally singing the theme song in my head-some of you may be, too).
Our theme verse was Isaiah 30:21
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”
Following Jesus is an unexpected journey. We have no assurance of a map to show us the way we’ll be going. Chasing security in a home or a ministry is a false god. My security is in Christ alone. It’s in His very nature, that His voice behind me is good and knowledgable and accessible. The only good place for me to put down roots is in Him alone.
Quite honestly, the path my life has taken certainly hasn’t followed any sort of map that I could have envisioned! The ways that He has called, the timing of when He calls, that all hasn’t super made sense to me. In looking back, however, I see how He has been faithful at every step. So I must face my future with the understanding that I may not know where I will next lay my head. I must continue to seek His direction for my path. Because I know that He alone is good.
And when I am at last with Him, then I will truly be home.